Thursday, August 14, 2008

What Exactly IS Sexy?

As we enter the heightened frenzy of carnival season, band choices, and skimpy costumes, the issue of some people not wanting the “well endowed” to play mas in their "sexy" section, or the idea of "sexy" mas bands continues to creep into conversations. This brings me to question... WHAT EXACTLY IS SEXY?

Now some of my carnival loving sisters have told me that THIN is sexy. UHHHHHH, ERRRRRR, UMMMMMM. Thin? OK, if you say so. An image of a very maga and gaunt Kiera Knightly comes to mind. Sorry, but in my humble opinion, SOOOOO NOT SEXY. Ok, ok. This image and the sarcastic undertones are overkill, and not a diss to thin women, who I also find to be very beautiful. I simply used this over exaggeration as an example to demonstrate that one cannot fit sexy into one word. What may be sexy to one person physically, may be totally unattractive to another.

(Photo courtesy of Paris boutique)

In this world of music videos, plastic surgery, and "thin is in" media.... women who don’t fit a certain standard of beauty find themselves bombarded with images of people who look NOTHING like them. This may mean not having the perfect hair, the perfect coloring, the perfect height, the perfect boobs, or the perfect size. We have been socialized to strive for physical perfection, when in reality, that perfection is as mythical as TRIBE not selling any costumes on the first day of registration. Something that just ain’t gonna happen!! LOL

When will we as women begin defining ourselves according to our OWN standards of beauty, and not those set by industries that usually encourage us to become consumers on the hunt for the “perfect” physical appearance?

We as women, no matter what size, need to teach our daughters, sisters, and ourselves positive ways of viewing each other and ourselves. This will entail the hardest change of all. CHANGING OUR THINKING.

- If a women feel she is too heavy.... the good news is, that is something that can be changed. Life is all about free will and options and we can choose to take them. Strike a healthy balance in your lifestyle choices and remember to do these things for the right reasons; a better sense of health and wellness. HEALTHY IS SEXY!!!!

- In this beautifully diverse world I pray that none of us would ever call someone of another race or ethnicity a racially derogatory name. We should take that same attitude of tolerance and apply it to weight and image matters. Just like people come in all colors and ethnic backgrounds, they also come in different sizes and shapes. By celebrating the good in people of all sizes, one by one, we build a better world. DIVERSITY IS SEXY!!!

- The days of cabbage rose embossed tented moo moo dresses are over. Not only do we have shops like Ashley Stewart and Lane Bryant which cater to our beautiful bodies, but also many main stream department stores like Macy’s and Nordstrom. If these designers can see that we are sexy enough to create for, then we better dam well KNOW we are sexy! Put on your sexy bra and pantie ensemble, cause it is not what the public can see underneath, but how it makes YOU feel! Then…you werk it. WERKING IT IS SEXY!!!


(Photos courtesy of Thicksational)

- OK, so you're heavy. Does that SOLELY define your life? I would hope not!! Do you have a job that you love and colleagues who respect you? A sexy ass man who LURVES him a plus size beauty? A family who adores you? The best-ESS “I can lime with, cry to, and tell my dirty little secrets too” girlfriends in the whole world? Then celebrate, because this is the REAL richness of life… not the size of your waistline. LIVING LIFE IS SEXY!!!!

- When was the last time you took a long candle lit bubble bath, treated yourself out to a 5 star dinner alone, jetted off to your dream vacation solo, or just plopped up in bed with a book by your favorite author while sucking down a box of your favorite culinary indulgence. Small things like this are an investment in you. DOING YOU IS SEXY!!!

- Express yourself honestly and openly without fear. Be solid in your opinions and stand up for your personal rights without infringing on the rights of others. Respect that all people have a voice, and feelings, no matter their size. Smile, it’s contagious. SELF EXPRESSION IS SEXY!!!

Sexy comes in all shapes, sizes, and colors. What is on the outside of our bodies does not determine our self worth as women. Are you kind? Do you enjoy life? Do you nurture loving relationships? Do you have sense of humor and can share a laugh with people in your life that you cherish? If you can answer yes to any of these questions, then… DAM YOU’RE SEXY!!!

Until next time, BE SEXY! (wink)

Voluptuous Masquerader
Voluptuous.masquerader@gmail.com